To Whom it May Concern:
Now. I am not pointing any fingers here. I am fully aware of the fact that I am a lady, and as such, am part of the minority that is on tour with y'all. I am also fully aware that boys will be boys. What y'all do is none of my concern, and in all honesty, I am perfectly happy to keep it that way.
THAT BEING SAID...
Would the person who last did laundry please come collect your things from the laundry room? Specifically, your things in the dryer? You seem to have left, er, some stuff in your pockets, there. Stuff that seemed to have melted down and created a... rubbery gooey mess all over the place. (I have a pretty good idea of that this rubbery gooey mess is, too, considering there are a few wrappers mixed in with the lot...)
Please clean it up, ASAP. Thank you.
Sincerely,
Suzi